Why do YOU care?


I learned from studying anthropology that  all communities love gossip.  They all love gossip that has to do with…who is sleeping with whom.  No joke.  Everyone cares, and I am not sure why.

Years ago, when I became emancipated (that is, moved out of my parents’ home), I moved in with my boyfriend and friends of his.  Some family members started asking where everyone slept, and who slept with whom.

Huh?  In actuality, I slept with my boyfriend, and one of my three roommates..well…she slept with her ‘main’ boyfriend (and later married him and had a child), and she also ‘slept’ with another roommate.

But, whose business was this?  Not mine.  It didn’t affect me.  Why would I care?  So, when the sexually curious asked where everyone slept, I was genuinely baffled, and asked….“Why do YOU ask?”

I have been living with a man, a fantastic roommate, for about 10 years.  The first five years or so, he still slept in what I still call his bedroom.  He told me that it was comfortable.  As he started piling stuff on his bed, it was not so comfortable, and he started sleeping…in another room in the house.

It’s a public part of the house, so when we have guests, I make him straighten it up.  Sometimes, however, people drop by, and the nosy ask, “Who sleeps there ?”

When I respond that my roommate sleeps there, some have actually asked me, “Why do you let him?”

What an absurd question.  He pays rent.  He can sleep wherever he wants, as far as I am concerned.  Why would I start an argument because he is not sleeping in his bedroom? What difference does it make?

These are not the same people who  would ask a politician….I mean, here it come out that Newt Gingrich (the  guy who left a wife in a hospital bed), asked he 2nd wife to be comfortable with him having 2 (or more?) lovers—while he was passing judgement on Bill Clinton for having sex outside of marriage!  & we have Rick Santorum saying that gay people are akin to people committing bestiality, and that if he had his druthers, birth control would be illegal. & these guys are getting money thrown at them so they can possibly defeat Barack Obama. No joke!  Because they would control the rest of us, this matters.  It speaks to their lack of integrity, as well as their attitude about who should be in charge of what.

I don’t understand the logic.  If the reason they are so concerned about this is that  their neighbors are breaking God’s law…don’t they think that GOD can  address the problem if HE thinks it’s a problem?

I know the twisted logic that goes along with being concerned about  who other people have sex with. If we don’t rein them in, and ostracize (or prosecute) them, then all the ostracizers believe is  a waste of energy.  They’d have to put their concerns into really taking action  about real human rights  problems.  They don’t want to do this. It’s easier to pass judgement without taking action.

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